My Little Boy

Jake had his first official haircut yesterday afternoon at Sports Clips with Ty. I discovered this is quite a traumatic experience for a mother. Jake's hair wasn't terribly long, but it doesn't curl so it was starting to get in his eyes and come down over his ears and definitely needed a trim. In the end result, he now looks like a little boy and not like a baby...He was great during the hair cut as he sat really still and his eyes just got bigger and bigger. He refused to crack a smile...I wonder if he thought this was some new doctor we were taking him too. The girl who cut it, Brenna, was really sweet with Jake. She is the girl who cuts Ty's hair so Ty trusted her! I can't believe Jake is turning 1 on Friday. It has been quite an exciting first year for him and really for all of us.

After the haircut yesterday, Ty kept Jake so I could go have dinner with a group of girlfriends. I try to organize "girl's night out" about once a month, but because of the holidays and Jake's surgery we all hadn't gotten together since early last fall. About 15 of us ate at The Melting Pot, a fun fondue restaurant in the Woodlands. They have a special on Monday night for girls with cheese fondue, salad, and yummy chocolate fondue. I think everyone had a really great time. Its a blessing to have good friends from church that all get along so well. Starting next week, ladies Bible class is starting on Thursday mornings and we're doing the new Beth Moore study. I'm SO excited to do this...I've always worked before and couldn't go so now that I'm a stay at home mom this year, this is an added perk. Plus, I love Beth Moore studies. She gets so deep in the Word and really makes me have to dig deeper. Her Bible studies have quite a bit of homework which is also good for me because it disciplines me to study my Bible. I'm such a type "A" personality, that structure works for me. I tend to get distracted if I don't have a specific study to do. Well, I'm going to try to get a few more things done before Jake wakes up. Have a blessed day!

He's a free man!

Jake is officially a free "man"! His quarantine time is over and he can be out and about and around other kids again. We got to take him to church on Sunday which was a huge blessing. It was so nice to be in church again as a family. My best friend Jenny's mom, Karla, happened to be in town and came to church with us. I spent many a night at her house in high school and it was so great to see her. Jake did so well too and made it the whole time without causing a scene and having to be taken out. I was still hesitant about the nursery so that worked out perfectly. Today he had his monthly Synagis shot so he should still be protected against RSV which can only help help his immune system as well. At the doctor today he weighed in at 21 pounds...that means he's gained 2 more pounds in the past two weeks. He's obviously eating very well and his heart functions properly now so he keeps the calories instead of burning them so quickly. To celebrate our healthy boy, his Grandma Jonesa and I took him to Chick-fil-a for lunch and bought Jake his first kid's meal. He ate all four chicken nuggets and the entire bowl of fruit. Its a little sad to me that he's really no longer a baby but becoming a little toddler. Everyone told me how fast time would fly and to enjoy every minute and its so true. Time does go by quickly and I have enjoyed every minute with Jake!

Here Jake is after church on Sunday...his new favorite part of the house is the bottom of the stairs. He loves to put different toys through the railing and then take them off. He's always busy!

Jake also loves to kiss pictures of himself...I'm glad he can play with other babies again so he won't think he's the only one out there :)

In this last picture he's desperately trying to get into the laundry room. I have to keep the door shut because he will inevitably spill the dog's water and put a few pieces of dog food in his mouth.

This is the sweater he wore today. His Uncle Jason and Aunt Jolie had given this to him when he was born and I was so excited that it was cold enough today for him to wear it and that he's gotten chubby enough for it to fit!

Thank You and our CHD Experiences X 2!

We just want to say thank you all those who helped us through this heart stuff with Jake. The following is just an attempt to do so but it's also our goal that maybe we can help others through these experiences so I have included a little part of our story.

Through a tiny ellipse of tissue called the sinoatrial node (situated in the back wall of the top of the heart’s right atrium), a set of signals originates to ensure each of our heart muscles operates as they should. The heart as designed is the world’s best engineered and most efficient pump as these muscles operate every second of every day and at least 2.5 billion consecutive times during a normal lifespan. This operation ensures that blood is transported through the human body in a continuous circle. This is how the heart should work. However, on February 14, 2007 (ironically the day recognized as National Congenital Heart Awareness Day) we were reminded that at times this continuous circle is damaged as our 14 day old son Jake was diagnosed with an Ostium Primum Atrial Septal Defect (ASD). Basically, this defect consists of a hole between the 2 atrium (upper collecting chambers of the heart) with a defect in one of the heart valves. The only solution to ensure a full lifespan and prevent more complicated cardiovascular problems is repair by open heart surgery. This just so happened to be the same defect I was diagnosed with and had repaired 11 years earlier. Only now I would be bringing along my wife of 5 years, Amy, and our first child into this story. They both have proved to be great warriors in this story and battle against Congenital Heart Disease (CHD). We soon found out that the story is not always as expected as Jake’s hole was almost half an inch in diameter (much bigger than mine) and would very quickly begin to create more complicated problems if not corrected within the first year of life.

As my family can attest and as the first word of the defect suggests, going through an atrial septal defect and open heart surgery is a trial. However, it’s a trial that has been conquered with the prayers and support from Church families literally around the country. We have been so blessed! Even though we may take our prayers casually at times, this experience has reinforced to us something we need to be reminded of every so often. It’s that every prayer, no matter how small, gives others life and hope. We are so thankful to each you who took the time to raise Jake up in prayer to God. We couldn’t have done it without the prayers. The following are just a few of the highlights in Jake’s recovery, and they were only possible with God’s help and through many answered prayers.

We immediately noticed that Jake no longer sweats like he has just run a marathon when feeding. An x-ray taken just three days post operation already showed new capillaries forming in the lungs indicating increased cardiovascular ability and that Jake’s heart was operating as a more efficient pump. Four days post operation with a split sternum, cut in half chest muscles, and back muscles that were just compressed way more than they were designed to be, Jake pulled himself up in his crib. Five days post operation, Jake was not only crawling again but climbing our stairs. He learned to modify his crawl by turning it into a bear type crawl with his elbows locked to put less stress on his chest. I don’t know if that’s just another one the body’s amazing ways of resilience or if he’s really that smart. As parents we are choosing to believe that’s it more of the latter. It’s hard to believe that someone who hasn’t said his first word or taken his first step could already make his Mom and Dad so proud, but Jake has done just that by showing he’s a true fighter.

Nationally, CHD’s continue to be the most common birth defect and are the number one cause of death from birth related defects during the first year of life. Technology has brought us to a point where specifically, ASD’s that are corrected can lead to an excellent quality of life with only a likelihood of re-operation to repair or replace the mitral valve many years later. As we have learned from others, CHD’s are not something that can be fully cured, but they can be managed. It’s said that the goal of any CHD survivor is to live a life long enough to die of something other than their heart defect. Many stories dealing with CHD’s do not have the same type of ending that ours has had so far. During our stay in ICU we were witness to a young mother who had a 10 month old girl who experienced serious complications during a procedure. Things did not go well and later that hour Amy and I shared the elevator with the hospital chaplain carrying her white Christening gown up to the family in ICU. How do you even begin to explain pain like that? I have no idea, but I’m continuing to learn that it’s not our job to explain all of God’s Ways and that we are not in control of life the way we like to think sometimes. To those of us in life who feel a need or sometimes duty to try and explain why things work the way they do, the above thought should be freeing. After all, God has shown that he loves to work within horrendous circumstances at times for good. Sometimes He even allows us the hindsight to see that His hand controlled the circumstance all along. However, what we do know without a doubt is that God wants to use our scars in some way to help others. Jake and I are looking forward to God showing us many ways to help others with our story in the coming years. Taking the words from one of our favorite songs (Caedmon’s Call, “Lead of Love”),

“the journey’s left its share of scars
“Looking back You know You had to bring me through
All that I was so afraid of
Though I questioned the sky, now I see why Had to walk the rocks to see the mountain view”

Everyone has holes in their heart along with numerous scars which lead us to different paths in life. It’s just that God has chosen and blessed (yes, I do mean blessed) Jake and I to have similar paths in heart defects and open heart surgery. Just by virtue of being born we all have a hole in our heart, and we obtain many more through our experiences in life. That’s where God comes in and fills all those holes with different types of patches. For those of us who have our holes filled and patched with Christ, we await the day that our hearts will be fully and perfectly restored to the natural form that God has promised. As joyful as we are that Jake’s day of surgery is over, we truly can’t wait for that Day. Until then, we all have to remember that we are playing small parts in God’s larger story. We should all look forward to coming into better understandings of how God wants to use our experiences and stories. If anyone happens to be drawn to any of these stories and not really know why, humbly propose that the story is only a vehicle to proclaim a story greater than our own. On that note, if anyone else ever happens to be in a similar medical/health experience or know of someone who is Amy or myself would be blessed to be able to help in any way possible. It’s definitely been and continues to be one of the primary stories of our life.

Ty, Amy, and Jake McCathran

Spaghetti Anyone?

I'm posting some pictures today of Jake's adventures at home. We have fallen into a great routine of eating, napping, playing (which consists of Jake crawling/trying to walk around the downstairs while destroying the house!), going for walks, and eating much more...Jake is napping now which is why I can take a few minutes to blog. He is my constant joy! In the first picture you can see him in his crib...I love this new expression of his. He will crinkle up his nose and squint his eyes when he's laughing...its priceless!

Here he is "helping" Ty install the baby gate at the top of the stairs. We had trouble finding one to fit our banister, but Ty bought one at Babies R Us this weekend that worked. Its wonderful to have so I don't have to worry about Jake upstairs as much anymore.

I forgot to add in last week's entry that Jake had gained two pounds since his surgery. He weighed in at 19 lbs. at Dr. Grenier's office last Tuesday. He had dropped down to 17 lbs. after surgery but is gaining quickly. He really loves to eat and even cries if you don't give it to him fast enough. I keep telling him patience is a virtue but that doesn't seem to help :) Last night we let him feed himself spaghetti for the first time. Ty and I laughed until we were crying watching him attempt to slurp the noodles down. He had a wonderful time and loved the pasta (even if it was whole wheat). You would think he was part Italian as much as he loves lasagna, macaroni, and now spaghetti.

New Year's Cookies

Monday two of my former students from Northland came over to make "New Year's" cookies with Jake and me. Molly is a freshman at UT and Chelsea is a freshman at Case Western in Ohio and they were still in town for Christmas break. Originally they were going to come over to make Christmas cookies, but we got postponed due to the surgery. The beauty of New Year's cookies is they can be whatever you want them to be! I have a plethora of cookie cutters so we made a wide assortment and had a great day catching up. Jake ate his first sugar cookie ever and he was definitely a fan as you can tell from his picture. We even made Gilbert a cookie or two so he was pretty excited as well.

Jake update: Jake had an appointment with Dr. Grenier yesterday and he came home with a great report. He held amazingly still for both his EKG and Echo and smiled at the doctor and all of the nurses. The really great news is there is absolutely no regurgitation from Jake's mitral valve. After surgery there was still a little more than they would have liked, but Dr. Grenier didn't see any at all yesterday. His right ventricle is also shrinking down to more of a normal size. Because his heart is decreasing in size, Dr. Grenier was actually able to find that Jake has another tiny hole in his heart. She suspected that it was there before surgery which means instead of having a partial AV/Canal defect, Jake has a complete AV/Canal defect. During surgery, Dr. Heinle did not see the hole and did not think it was present. Dr. Grenier says it is so small that it would be almost impossible to detect during surgery since there would have been no blood flowing. She says this is completely harmless for Jake and will NOT require surgery or even medication. It just means he will always have a slight heart murmur. He has been on two heart medications since last May. We will slowly stop one medication over the next two weeks and he will just stay on the other for another few months. We will go back again in one month for one more echo and then Jake will just have to go to the cardiologist once a year for check-ups. At the end of the visit, she told us to take our "normal" kid home. What a wonderful phrase! She said she just wants us to keep him in the house for two more weeks and then we can rejoin the world and Jake can be around others again. In the meantime, thank God for the wonderful weather in Houston. Jake and I took a great walk today and enjoyed the outdoors.

Another Disappointing Bowl Game

Last night OU lost its FOURTH straight BCS game as they lost to West Virginia in the Fiesta Bowl. At least last year they could claim they played whole-heartedly as the game went into overtime and was deemed one of the best college bowl games ever. This year it didn't look like they showed up. Granted they had several players benched or injured, but this team has claimed to be deep and versatile all year. What happened? It was honestly hard to watch and I didn't finish watching the game. I decided I wanted sleep more than I wanted to watch another disaster. I am not a fair weather fan...I was a fan when their quarterback Charles Thompson ended up on the cover of Sports Illustrated in his orange prison jumpsuit, I was a fan when they went 3-8 in 1996, I was even a fan when the horrible Howard Schnellenberger coached them; I would just like to see OU have a little pizazz and a little more heart in the post-season. I also realize football is not that important. It is a fun hobby to watch the Sooners play each fall, but I can't let it be that important.

What is important? Jake, of course. Jake is always important! I'll finish my sad diatribe on college football and switch to the real love in my life (besides Ty, of course!) Jake's energy level seems to be increasing daily...he's exploring the house like he's never explored before...he's "talking" all day long. Yesterday he said "mama" all day long and it was so beautiful to hear. Granted, he calls everything "mama" and says it just to hear his voice, but I don't care. It still is a wonderful word. He laughs so hard at everything and still gives kisses incessantly. His favorite is to give himself kisses in the mirror...we're not too worried about his self-esteem :) I was worried I would go crazy during our "incubation" period while Jake has to stay in and let his immune system go back to normal, but I'm really enjoying my days with him. I even looked online and found baby lesson plans. I guess maybe I just miss teaching, but I got so excited looking at them. One website just has fun songs and games to play with your baby. I realize I have so much to teach Jake. Now if we just could get him to sleep through the night, we'd be doing great! Here he is today in his cute hoodie sweatshirt his Aunt Jen got him...he's happy in one picture playing with his baseball and pretty mad in the next. What a kid!

Happy New Year and Thank You!

Since it's the first day of 2008 and I've been a bit absent from the blog I thought I'd just take some time to write. This blog has only survived due to Amy's excellent posts and numerous pictures of Jake so please thank her if you have enjoyed it.

It would be impossible to describe 2007 with words as it has seemed to fly by at times yet it's included some of the longest days of both mine and Amy's life. I guess that's the way it is when you have the birth of your first child and your famliy goes through a second open heart surgery. Over the next few months and as time allows I will most likely be writing a few different posts about our experiences in dealing with congenital heart defects. Being the sports fan I am, I am reminded of Jim Valvano's famous speech he gave on ESPN when he received the Aurthur Ashe Courage Award. This was given 2 months before he passed away of cancer. A portion of it is as follows:

"To me, there are three things we all should do every day. We should do this every day of our lives. Number one is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number two is think. You should spend some time in thought. And number three is, you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think, and you cry, that's a full day. That's a heck of a day. You do that seven days a week, you're going to have something special."

This helps to describe our year as we have had many, many full days yet it's been something special. We are eternally grateful for all the support through encouraging discussions, cards, meals, emails, and most importantly all the prayers. Without those things we would have most likely gone insane. We look forward to getting back to "normal" in about 4 weeks when Jake will be fully recovered so we can spend some time with friends and family.